Monday, July 14, 2008

Pay Your Spouse a Tremendous Compliment-Pay Attention

I must admit that sometimes I get influenced by the movie world that when you love someone, you must be able to read their thoughts and vice versa. While that is not entirely erroneous, the lifeline to a good relationship is the effective manner in which we communicate with our loved ones. When we know a person well, we would have things in common and shared goals. Therefore, there is reason to believe that some kind of a known reaction can be expected from our partners.

Nevertheless, one would be in trouble if one assumes that he or she knows what their spouses are thinking or feeling every time. Therefore, it is vital that we learn to communicate well and listen carefully as well. It is not as easy nor as difficult as it sounds but there is room for improvement for even the most eloquent speakers there is. Each individual respond differently and we must not think that what is an effective way in "solving" matters at work is equally effective at home. Sometimes the opposite might apply.

Take for example that a wife might complain that her husband never spend enough time with her. He could reason that he already spent the whole day with her on weekends or the week before. While he may now think of just setting another day at his schedule or calendar, what the wife really need is some appreciation that she had for the day and some words of comfort. It may not need to be a specific solution but a listening ear. So be generous in your compliments, that goes for both the husbands and the wives and trained yourselves to listen well to the emotions between the lines.

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